Being a Mummy has so many rewarding aspects but no-one ever tells you the low times. All parents are different and react to changes in there lives in the best way they see fit. But sometimes these changes can become overwhelming and make you feel like you have lost your way in the world. Before I became pregnant with Isabelle I worked two jobs (by choice), I'm one of those people that likes to busy and never sleep. I had a group of close friends whom I regularly became inebriated with at the weekends and enough late night meanderings to keep anyone from being bored.
Thankfully and un-thankfully all in one sentence I left this life behind me and truthfully if anyone offered it me back I would refuse, kick them were it hurts and run so fast there would be smoke billowing from my stiletto's. I wouldn't leave my new world for anything, If it meant I had to give up precious time with my daughter. However life would still get me down when I felt I was "just a mum" and I got mowed down with the feelings of where do I now belong. I've said it before and I will say it again. I'm not one of those mums that huddles in corners with other mum's at daily play groups talking in long mummy words, so at times it was a lonely life. I knew I had to find something for me to focus my energy on something I could be proud of that was mine, just mine and all about me. That may sound selfish but I felt trapped in a mummy bubble with no escape. My life became monotonous and I could feel my own personal ID drifting away.
So what did I do?
Firstly I found a job that had no ties, no hours and no commitment needed. I became a mystery shopper and diner. This gave me a sense of purpose and helped me feel like I was contributing to the family income again. I could pick up as much or as little work as I wanted. Hours fitted around me and no-one demanding deadlines down my ear. It helped for a while but soon I felt myself drifting inwards again. It just wasn't enough. So in August 2013 I decided to write a blog, this blog in fact and write about all those things I didn't feel were fully in grasp any more. Beauty, fashion and cool lifestyles. I kept this up for a while and although the commitment and pressure of getting things done was great for someone with continuous ants in their pants and a strong case of OCD, it still wasn't quite filling that void. In February of this year we packed up our lives into a hundred boxes and relocated across town to a much bigger and more well equipped family home which is where it seems I found my calling. I took some time off from the blog to tackle the house renovations and unpacking of boxes filled with mounds of crap. After a long month away I realised that the only way to be happy in this world is to be yourself and aim for your dreams. So that's what I did. I overhauled my blog figured out what it was I wanted to write about and set sail on my next journey. I started writing about my interests, my thoughts and my life but best of all it's now jam packed with personality. I'm pleased to say I've never been happier or more proud of who I have become. Taking those little steps to find out who I am post-partum has helped me mentally and emotionally become a better person and mother.
Who am I?
I'm Clare a full time Mummy to Isabelle, Mystery shopper/diner, blogger, soon to be vlogger, running amateur and Shopcade contributor. But most of all I'm me.
Miss Savvy Mum